Oh get over it, people. It wasn’t THAT bad! For the film experts who have been living under a rock, the original 1968 Planet of the Apes with Charlton Heston is a brilliant science fiction masterpiece that has stood the test of time, spawning four mediocre sequels, a television series, spoofs, rip-offs, and pop culture references. Even though some of the effects make it look dated, it still holds up for many people. Around the early 90’s there were rumors of a new Planet of the Apes floating around Hollywood. Rumors that it would be helmed by someone like Steven Speilberg or Oliver Stone.

So, who was the lucky guy they hired to direct this pointless remake? Why, Tim Burton of course! Hot off the success of Sleepy Hollow. A rather unlikely choice. What do I mean by that? Well, Tim Burton’s films are dark, at times depressing, strange, and kooky. So, Planet of the Apes doesn’t seem like his type of movie. But knowing him, he’s destined to Burton it up!

Not keeping the same brilliance or sci fi feeling of the original Heston vehicle, Burton offered a much different take on the story. In fact, its said that this is in some ways actually truer to the novel by Pierre Boulle. Well, I have not read it, so I’m merely looking at this as a movie. Well, Burton ignored the characters from the original and changed everything. The apes are more medieval and the humans can talk.

The story focuses on Leo Davidson, who goes after his chimpanzee and is sucked through a vortex that brings him to a planet where the humans are slaves and the apes are the master. The apes are lead by the ruthless Thade and Attar. Leo meets Ari, a humans rights activists, and Krull, her family’s servant. They lead a party of apes and humans in a quest to find the truth behind the war between ape and man.

I am one of the biggest Tim Burton geeks on the planet and I found this film not as good as the original, but entertaining. Burton’s Planet of the Apes offers good action, great special effects, and the make-up by Acedemy Award winning make-up artist Rick Baker is light years ahead of the original. All in all, it makes a good summer blockbuster. But as a remake, you can’t defend it at all.